Our government is unconstitutional.
Our constitution is a joke to begin with. Don’t forget our disgusting confessional system, to which they give a fancy name: consociational “democracy”. OK.
Our prime minister has a brilliant idea: he will not accept the resignation of the HezbAllah ministers and will ask Fatfat to send his tea-serving forces to drag them from their beds to attend the cabinet meetings. At least they will be busy with that, so 11-year-old and 14-year-old kids’ lives will be spared for some time.
Our dear Fatfat’s position is unconstitutional. Bassem El-Saba’a’s resignation as minister of interior was a while back (way before the summer war), but it was not accepted; Fatfat was assigned as interim minister of interior, but el-Saba’a is still in the country, which means we have two ministers of interior, the mandate of one of them, that of the child-killer Fatfat, being illegal. Oh joy!
Our country has no foreign minister. He resigned. But anyway, what foreign policy does Lebanon have? That of Riyadh and Washington. And before that, that of Damascus. OK.
Our prime minister talks about preserving democracy. I wouldn’t mind holding a referendum about sending him to Riyadh to preach his democratic values to his masters.
Our unconstitutional government reminds us again about our duty never to forget the thief who stole $40 billion from the people. Like we ever will.
Our government is still not over the shock of HezbAllah having disrupted the Saudi royal family’s summer vacation plans. We remind the Saudi royal family that the beaches at Tel Aviv have as many, if not more half-naked women as Beirut’s beaches. Oil-free too. But might not be Zilzal-free next summer. Nevertheless, a suggestion. We can’t help but be nice. We are Phoenicians after all. One of our achievements has been the acquisition of 10 fishing boats, which now make up our navy fleet. The pride of our nation. Or something like that.
This is your Lebanon.
In other news, the Arab league has decided to end the boycott of the Palestinian people, which was imposed by it because of their democratic choice to give Hamas the mandate. I did not know the Arab league had imposed such a boycott. But I was not surprised when I found out.
And that is your Arab world.